The Real Writer

Pretend You're Published

Yes, I know, we all write because we love writing, and if we never published, we'd still do it. Right? Actually, that's true. But most of us still have that distant ache of Why am I not published yet? However good we are at not tuning into the feeling, it's still there, running underneath all we say and do, and it's draining, isn't it? As long as you allow it to, it pulls away a percentage of your consciousness and energy that are always at work (uselessly, most of the time, I might add) on this problem, and could be better used elsewhere. Maybe...um...in your writing? Or how about your life?

We've all heard about how we need to live in the present, how the present is where we create the future - by the seeds we sow today - the thoughts and emotions we have this minute. So how do we let go of this publication thing and enjoy life, enjoy our writing, and also believe that, one day, we too will find our book on the B&N remainder table? :)

It's pretty simple really. Pretend you're published. Pretend that you've got a book deal and your book is coming out one year from now. So, with that taken care of, what would you do with that year? How would you enjoy your life? What would you focus on? What would you write?

Sit down right now and answer these questions. Make a 'life' list and a 'writing' list. Then start at the top of each and do and write those things.

And start planning a publication party, because I bet once you've relinquished your death grip on that desire, it will happen faster than you think.

Soundtrack to Your Story

Working hard on the novel today and having a terrific time, not just because I'm at a good place in the book and things are fun and flowing, but because I'm playing the soundtrack to the story.

You probably already know what this is; maybe you do this unconsciously when you write - play music that energizes and inspires you. What kind of music depends on what you're writing. If you're in a serious spot in the book you're probably not going to play Madonna's disco album or 80s hair band music (though I think Split Enz's 'Six Months in Leaky Boat' could work). But have you actually created a CD of music that would be the soundtrack to your book if it were made into a movie? This can be incredibly helpful - creating an atmosphere, a mood, that can give you just the right emotional boost for whatever scene you're writing.

The songs will create the thoughts and feelings of your characters for you in a visceral, intangible way, like nothing else can. In this way, writers are like actors. Why not try on your characters a bit so you can channel them better? Wear something they would. Eat their food. Rent a movie they would love. Do something they would but you wouldn't (ie travel by yourself, take an art class, attend a support group). Get creative. It really pays off. (Just be careful - don't get yourself into trouble!)

Here's the soundtrack I'm listening to as I write today:

Zero 7 - Destiny
Bobby Darin - Beginning to See the Light
Englebert Humperdink - After the Lovin'
Rosemary Cloony - Mambo Italiano
Ambrosia - Biggest Part of Me, You're the Only One
Player - Baby Come Back
Me First and the Gimme Gimmes - Mandy
Neil Diamond - Sweet Caroline
Bee Gees - More than a Woman
Johnnie Rivers - Secret Agent Man
Don McLean - Miss American Pie

Wouldn't you want to read this book?

Picture This: Published Writer

I once tried to learn to play golf. Got a club, had a lesson, was interested in it, wanted to give it a go - but it didn't work. It didn't work because I couldn't see myself as a golfer. It was just too far away from the image I had of myself.

Wanting a certain kind of life, certain kinds of friends or relationships, to be a certain kind of person, or writer, can only get you so far if you can't see it. If you can't imagine it. For some of us, as we have experiences, as we grow as writers, as we have our successes, our perception of ourselves changes and the scope of what we can picture about our writing and our writing life widens. Others easily picture themselves winning the National Book Award. Bastards. :)

Look at yourself now compared with where you were when you first started writing. Make a list of the things you've done and learned and succeeded at since. It can be as simple as, "wrote a poem." Even if you have just that one thing on your list, don't discount it. Suddenly, now, there's a poem, where there wasn't one. That's a big deal. And because of it you're not the same person/writer.

If you see yourself as always struggling, as being a writer who is rejected or not good enough for the best literary magazines, or someone who will be a great unpublished writer (whose work the world will discover in 100 years and won't they be sorry then that nobody cared while you were alive, right?), then that's what you'll be.

Start to picture the kind of success you want to have as a writer NOW. If you want to be published, daydream about getting the acceptance call from your agent, about signing the contract in some publisher's office, depositing a huge check (!), book signings, readings, walking into a bookstore and seeing your book, being stopped on the street and told how much someone loved your last poetry collection or novel.

At first this may feel dumb and awkward, and you might only be able to do it for a few minutes. But commit to doing it every day - when you wake up and before you go to bed. Let yourself feel excited and grateful.

Why should you be singled out as a failure? If that's possible, couldn't you just as easily be a success?

"Nothing we ever imagined is beyond our powers, only beyond our present self-knowledge."
-- Theodore Roszak

Kairos vs Chronos

The Greeks recognized that there are two entirely different aspects of time: chronos and kairos. Sarah Ban Breathnach, in her book Simple Abundance, gives us insight into the differences:

"Chronos is clocks, deadlines, watches, calendars, agendas, planners, schedules, beepers. Chronos is time at her worst. Chronos keeps track. Chronos is the world's time. Kairos is transcendence, infinity, reverence, joy, passion, love, the Sacred. Kairos is intimacy with the Real. Kairos is time at her best. Kairos is Spirit's time. We exist in chronos. We long for kairos. That's our duality. Chronos requires speed so that it won't be wasted. Kairos requires space so that it might be savored. We do in chronos. In kairos we're allowed to be. It
takes only a moment to cross over from chronos into kairos, but it does take a moment. All that kairos asks is our willingness to stop running long enough to hear the music of the spheres."

The best life is one in which there is a balance between Chronos and Kairos. Writing takes place in Kairos. If too much of your time is Chronos (which includes always doing for others and being the 'go to' person for everything - both at work and at home), your creative energy begins to dissipate - dry up - and it takes a lot more effort to find it, coax it into being, and get it going again. Schedule more Kairos time into your day and your week. Pick a few hours on the weekend (at least) when family and friends fend for themselves. You're first responsibility is to yourself. Only when you meet your own needs - both basic and creative - will you be able to fully give to others.

YOU DESERVE TIME TO WRITE. It is your right to have time for the things that make you happy. If writing is one of them, then tell whoever needs to be told when you are off limits so you can enjoy some Kairos. Note I said 'tell,' not 'ask.' Be gentle, but be firm. This goes for telling yourself too. At first it will be hard to ignore the kids fighting and the laundry, or the report that's due, or the phone, but be strong! Even if nothing comes and you don't write a word, sit still with a notebook and don't move until the time is up. You will at least be thinking, and your writing mind will be taking note of your efforts. Eventually it will come around and offer you something. You can't bully it! It has to believe you will make time for it on a regular basis.

Your writing, your voice, your ideas, your imagination - all precious and deserving of your attention. It's worth it. You're worth it. Make time. Kairos.

Imperfection, Spontaneity, and Risk - Top 3 Tips

TOP THREE THINGS: (these won’t be a surprise!)

1) The first and best thing you can do to bring more spontaneity, imperfection, and risk into your work is to MAKE TIME TO WRITE – REGULARLY. If you don’t do this, every time you do manage to squeeze out time, you will be overwhelmed with all your ideas, guilt because you haven’t written, and the feeling like you really have to make it count, so what you write needs to be great, and you will end up squeezing the life out of your writing. When you only have little bits and pieces of time, it’s hard to keep in the mental and emotional swing of the piece you’re working on. You spend a lot of time just settling down and organizing your thoughts.

If you have a really busy schedule, see where you can cut back. A creative mind needs time and space to open, to daydream, to gather, to play around. It doesn’t do well with fifteen minutes here and there (though take those if they're all you have). So you need to make time to write – at least 3 times a week – regular days and times, like an appt with yourself. Give yourself a minimum of two hours if you can. No less than one. (As you get regular times under your belt, you can be more flexible and reschedule as needed. Create the habit first.)

2) You also should have a writer’s journal that you carry with you at all times. One with you and one in the car. Jot down impressions, ideas for stories, bits of dialogue you heard, something you saw, something you felt, a question you want to answer.

3) Writing exercises. Get some books of these and work your way through them – pick random exercises or start at the beginning (or start at the end). Whatever feels right to you. These will allow you to experiment with a range of ideas, images, feelings, experiences. It’s like an exercise or health plan for the writer. Sometimes you will produce something amazing and sometimes you won’t. That’s not how doing exercises should be judged – on what you produce. It’s the act itself – of writing, of exploring and experimenting – that's where the real gold is.

Stay tuned for more detailed tips...

Get a New Toy

How can you breathe new life into your writing? How can you get more spontaneity, imperfection, and risk into your work? I'm going to be doing a series of posts about this, but I'd like to start with a story first.

My westie, Keegan, is fourteen. He's a fabulous dog (anyone who knows me knows I'm crazy about him and with good reason, in my opinion!). I like to keep him as active as possible - long walks, playing, etc. Well, for the last two weeks, I have not been able to get him interested in any of his toys. I went through all sorts of ridiculous gyrations trying to get his attention - I threw them around, kicked them around, snuck up on him with them, walked them slowly under his nose and - nothing. I dumped out the big basket of toys I have and spread them out on the floor, which usually gets his interest, to the point where he'll come by and take several of them one by one, as if he's making a pile of his favorites, and then he'll play with these for a few weeks. This time he completely ignored me.

Being the fanatical dog mother I am, I told a friend about this, and that I was worried he was starting to really slow down, that this was the beginning of the end, and I didn't know what to do - worked myself up about it - and my friend simply said, "Chris, get him a new toy. He just needs a new toy."

Duh.

Worked like a charm.

So my first word of advice to you is - do something new. Either in your writing (try a new technique - for a quick one, write in the voice of someone else (a persona piece) or in your life or both. Go to a new restaurant, or a movie you wouldn't normally see. Rent some foreign films. Visit a new neighborhood in your city. If you're religious - go to a different church. Go to a festival. Buy an article of clothing you wouldn't normally wear, wear it somewhere, and see how you feel. Try a new food. Listen to new music.

You can't keep moving in the same circle every day and expect your writing to zing. Get some new input - especially sensory. Gather new experiences, images, sounds, tastes, smells. All of this will come in handy at some point. Take your notebook and describe everything. Use fragments if that will help. You're not trying to write beautiful prose in that moment - you're just trying to absorb your environment as vividly and specifically as you can. Include how you feel.

Get a new toy.

Leave Room for Wonder

I'm working with a group of writers who are all polishing books, and so I've had beginnings and endings of books on the brain. I wanted to share this tip with you:

Don't answer every single question in your book. All writing is done to explore some kind of question - but there doesn't necessarily have to be a complete answer. Leave some room for the reader to wonder what could happen, what might. Let them obsess; let them try to solve the issues in their own mind.

A great teacher of mine, in talking about poetry, said that a good poem doesn't come to a full stop, it pauses; it rests. A good poem could go on from the ending if you wanted it to. This is also true for fiction.

IN SHORT: leave room for the reader's imagination to enter the story - not just in what you do and don't tell, or your characters do and don't say, but the ending itself.

Homework - Getting Some Perspective

I just gave this 'homework' to a new coaching client and thought I'd pass it on to you. It's always good to step back and take stock of our influences and goals, as well as what we think is problematic in our writing. Why? Read through the questions first, and I'll tell you.

1) Make a list of 5 writers you read regularly. Write down why you like their writing - not just the technical elements of their stories, but things like the tone or mood of their writing. The effect it has on you. Maybe its audience. Maybe how it makes you think or how it lingers with you long after you finish it.

You want to approach it like this: "This is what I love about it - it takes me into another world." (for example)

Now, ask yourself: How does the writer do that? What does he/she do craftwise/stylewise/voicewise to make that happen?" Try to do this so that your answers are a blending of the two parts of the question rather than two separate answers to two separate questions.

As writers, we have to look at the person behind the curtain. Not to imitate them - you want to keep your own style/voice - but to see how they made things happen in their story, how they approached their characters, or topic, etc., so you can try that method if you're attracted to it.

2) What writing habits do you have that you don't think serve you? What are 'mistakes' you find yourself making over and over in your stories? What are things you want to do in your writing and just don't know how? What element do you struggle with the most? (For example: maybe you have trouble writing dialogue, or you constantly forget to describe people, things like that.)

So now the why: so you can take steps to address the problem (get a book on writing dialogue, copy pages of dialogue from books you like to tape above your desk for inspiration, spend time 'overhearing' conversations in public, writing them down, then spiffing them up a little by introducing a conflict or backstory), or look at your writing and decide whether or not your influences are working for you or against you. Maybe you're trying too hard to incorporate a style that doesn't suit you. Maybe it's time to try reading some new writers. There's always room for improvement.

You get a physical every year, right? Give your writing a physical too. Look at what you're putting into your head, and what's coming out on the page. Are you reading and writing the same old stuff? Are you taking risks by writing about something new to you? Are you trying something new in your writing? Even switching from past tense to present can make a difference. Are you 'gathering' from inspiring places? Are you 'gathering' at all? Time to schedule a trip to a museum, or attend a poetry reading, or rent some foreign/independent films. Go to the theatre. Go somewhere unusual. I just took a tour of Greenmount Cemetery here in Baltimore and got a fabulous novel idea from a story about one of the people buried there. (Not telling what it is!) Get out there!

But first, do your homework.

You are the Wall

I bet you think, somewhere in the back of your mind (or maybe the front!), that artists (including writers) have to suffer for their art. In case no one has told you: that's a load of bull.

It's not true.

We hold ourselves back from fully engaging in, experiencing, and enjoying whatever our passion is (writing for most of the people who read these posts) - no one else. We make quick decisions, out of fear and uncertainty, not to try something--or even explore the possibilities--or not to finish what we started, because we believe we know it's not going to work out, or it's the wrong thing for us, or we think we're going to ruin it. So a wall goes up, and we then blame that wall on someone or something else, when really the person in our way is us. Each of us is our own wall. You are the wall.

This can be changed with one simple (but difficult) step: ask yourself what it is you feel you must suffer for. What is it that you think makes you undeserving? What's the terrible thing you did? What is the terrible thing about yourself that means you are unworthy of whatever it is you want (not just as a writer) in your life?

You may get an answer right away, you might not. If the latter, keep revisiting the question until the answer rises up. You'll know it when it comes - it might come peacefully, or it might be like having a bucket of cold (or hot?) water poured over you. The knowledge passes through you, viscerally. If the answer you receive doesn't feel right - keep asking. It should feel like a relief to recognize it, even if also uncomfortable.

Write the answer down and then write below it all the reasons that it's false. Use positive statements like, "I am..." (Don't say, "it's false because...") Then do something symbolic - tear off the part of the paper with the reason, rip it up, and throw it away. Keep the reasons why its false. Read them out loud and do so each day for one week. Then declare yourself free of the belief and release it. (Picture it like some animals you release into the wild, or maybe a big, black bird that flies away.)

Our beliefs - whether we've absorbed them from our family, friends, the media, or teachers - need to be regularly examined. Ask yourself if what you believe is really yours, or taken from someone else. Did the people around you pursue their dreams? Do they support your writing? If not, they are probably not the right people to model your beliefs on. Make sure that you are valuing and believing in what is right and best for you. Discard the rest. Nothing will happen--you will still be you--except you'll feel better and have more drive for your dreams.

The Beauty of a Deadline

I spent most of last week preparing my application for Breadloaf, the big writers conference in Middlebury, VT. Actually, I should say that I spent a very sleepless last week sorting through poems, editing poems, rejecting poems, hating poems, loving poems, reordering them again and again, and filling out the application about 5 times because I was so tired I kept making typos and not making sense in the mini-essay. Between my day job and teaching, I just didn't have time for the application, but I did it anyway. Why? Because, whether or not I'm accepted to Breadloaf, I know what a deadline can do for my writing.

In a nutshell: it cuts through the bullshit.

With a deadline looming over you, you don't have time to stare dreamily out of windows, spend hours thumbing through a thesaurus, calling your poet friends to dissect every line of a poem, or to sit sulking about what a great undiscovered writer you are (if you only had the time or the money or...)

There's no time for that - every moment counts! Suddenly, you have special powers you didn't have before--you can see your poems with new eyes, which means you're able to delete those darlings (your favorite lines, words, and metaphors) without shedding a tear or batting an eye; you're able to see where a poem should go and doesn't; you can hear the music in your lines, or lack thereof, and know where to add it. You know what poems are worth something and what poems aren't. The ones that are you bring back to life with new energy. The veil is lifted and romance is replaced by reality.

This is the beauty and value of a deadline. Whether it's for a class or a contest or a conference. If you're not in the habit of applying for things - START. Get the blood going; get your brain zinging. Having all the time in the world to write something doesn't always mean good writing. Adrenaline can be a powerful muse.

Here are 3 more good reasons:

1) Taking a class, or submitting to contests and conferences, as well as literary magazines, makes you part of the writing community. It connects you to the Great Big World of Writing out there.

2) It's very satisfying to 'finish' old pieces you thought were hopeless, and discover how good they are. It reminds you that you are a real writer.

3) You might win something!

Now get out there. Go!